What are you avoiding?
Most of us are avoiding something most of the time. I am not speaking of procrastination. We may be delaying an item on our to-do list but know that we plan to do it. Rather, I am talking about avoiding the truth about something that might be irritating, problematic, fear-inducing, or difficult. We might question our ability to solve whatever problem we are avoiding. We might feel embarrassed in knowing the truth and therefore avoid asking the tough question. The things we are avoiding might be small or very big. What is the impact of avoiding that thing and how do we face the truth?
When I am avoiding something, I feel the weight on my shoulders. I am not as positive as I usually am. The thing I am avoiding is always lurking in the back of my mind. I feel less courageous. This avoidance behavior can interrupt my sleep, increase my stress and anxiety, and cause me to seek relief in ways that are not beneficial. Does this sound familiar?
Let me give you an example of my avoidance of a small thing. I generally weigh a pound or two below or above the weight I am comfortable with, and I do this with healthy eating and exercise. I get on the scale once a week to make sure I am maintaining my weight. For a few reasons, I have been indulging in a lot of comfort food lately (think potatoes and pasta), have eaten more dessert than normal, and have eaten fewer fruits and veggies. My pants are a little tighter and I am uncomfortable. I avoided getting on the scale because I didn’t want to know how many pounds I was over my goal. After all, then it would be real, and I would need to act. I finally did it the other day and now, I have proof that will drive me to get my nutrition back in line and not miss a day of planned exercise. I went and made a large pot of vegetable soup for my lunches, did my weight training, and ran twice this week. I am back on track.
Maybe the thing you are avoiding is opening your credit card bill because you made a lot of Amazon purchases during the month, and you are wondering how you will pay the bill. But by doing it, you can then set yourself free to figure out what to do, which might mean returning some items, cutting back on Starbucks, and evenings out.
Maybe you are avoiding a difficult conversation with someone. There is something the person is doing that is intrusive or maybe undermining your confidence. You are avoiding the discussion because you are worried about how they will react or your ability to deliver the message in an empathetic manner. But, by avoiding the conversation, you might blow up at that person the next time they behave in a way that irritates you. So, you end up having the conversation, but it is more difficult due to the delay.
My advice, take a deep breath, rip off the band-aid, and face the truth. Knowledge is power.