Make new friends
If you were a Girl Scout, you might remember these lyrics, “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, and the other, gold. A circle's round it has no end. That's how long I'm gonna be your friend.” How important is it to have old and new friends in our lives and how should we go about cultivating those relationships?
Friendships help you maintain a healthy life. According to Mayo Clinic, “Good friends are good for your health. Friends can help you celebrate good times and support you during bad times. Friends help keep you from feeling alone. Friends also can:
Raise your sense of connection, belonging and purpose.
Boost your happiness and lower your stress.
Improve your self-confidence and feelings of self-worth.
Help you cope through hard times, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one.
Urge you to change or avoid habits that aren't healthy. These might include drinking too much or not exercising.”[1]
Making new friends can be fun but also stressful. I used to think that I had enough friends and did not need more. But I moved to a new community and left my 8 to 5 job and have found that I have more time on my hands and less daily social interaction. In cultivating new friendships, I was at first worried that people would not have a mutual interest. I recently reached out to a new friend to invite her to lunch. We had not done this before, and I was nervous. We had lunch and she expressed how much she enjoyed it, and I did too. We have made follow-up plans. Have you found yourself in a similar situation? Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and make new friends.
Continue cultivating your old friendships but don’t be afraid to let some go. Take time to spend with your friends. This can be hard if you have a busy work life and a family to care for, but it is worth it. It can be as simple as grabbing a cup of coffee or a quick phone call. Maintain a steady connection and do simple things to let your friends know that they are important to you. Text messages or cards on their birthdays are an easy way to do this. However, sometimes it is okay to let an old friend go. Maybe that relationship is not what it was, or the person’s behavior indicates a change in their values that you think are important.
Don’t underestimate how new and old friendships enrich your life. Take the time to cultivate new friendships and maintain old friendships. You will be thankful!
[1] Mayo Clinic Staff, “Friendships: Enrich Your Life, Improve Your Health,” https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860